My Journey Through Chalice Wells Garden; my journey of releasing the old to allow new seeds to be sown.

A personal journey withof sisterhood, and stepping in the sisterhood of the ages

Sooooo . . .

I went with bunch of truly wonderful women to Glastonbury on Saturday; partly to do some release work. Partly to do have some fun!

Chalice Wells Garden; Glastonbury

I want to just share what I got from the day.

The night before, I went to sleep at 22.22 (no lie) and fell asleep to a truly Universally connecting experience. I woke at 2.22, and never went back to sleep. One of the other ladies only went to sleep after I had woke up, we found out later! You couldn’t make this stuff up!

The reason became clearer when I read this piece:  https://www.elephantjournal.com/2017/02/reason-we-keep-seeing-the-numbers-2-22-222-or-2222/

It is a very feminine number, linking me into the feminine energy, and all that embodies, even before I have got there. An energetic builder and worker of energies; a manifesting number. Divine order and allowing life to flow upon the vibrations of introspection, acceptance and harmony. Time for Balance. New beginnings. Perfect! Thank you Universe.

When we got to the Chalice Well gardens we were left to walk and wander and do what we needed to do. I was told to find a stone to drop into the well at the deepest part; to let go of all of my fear based emotion that had been holding me back.

As I dug around the manicured beds, struggling to find a stone (and disturbing everyone in the process!), I was also drawn to pick up a seed. Ok, makes sense. Letting go of the negative to fill the void with a new seed of new starts.

So I took my stone (which I wasn’t happy with as it was that natural, but hey ho!) and sat with it in my hands, allowing me to absorb all my fear based emotion until I was ready. I then dropped it in the well and thanked the wonderful, fertile Goddess energy that resides there, with a little nod.

I then moved down with my seed in hand. I felt the need to pick up some petals that were on the pathway to place in the water at a later point, in order to thanks the Goddess further. I sat in a little alcove of flowers and ivy and looked up. People had placed ribbons and trinkets in the roof. I added my petal. And connected into a Nun, who used to reside here. ‘Just Be’ she told me. ‘Relax. Don’t think. Don’t analyse.’ And so I sat for while. When I stood and the nun told me to go around and up a mound and sit with the tree there. It was waiting to talk to me. And sure enough, a tree on a mound. I sat at it’s base and sat with it. Just being. I felt it. I felt the joy it took in the Sun warming the tops of the leaves. The sheer bliss of it. Reaching up happily and enjoying the wind tickling it’s branches, making it sway. Giggling at the wind. The connection it had to everything around it. The grass, the plants, me. Just being aware of them and that simple awareness was enough to let them live together. No need to interfere with how they live, with how they function, with what they do. And the feeling of all the grass being a collection of naughty little children playing all around her. And the joy she took in them playing at her feet. Too many to count, but who’s counting? She was just feeling the pleasure in her connection to them. Not chastising. Not guiding. Just being with them.

I asked how do I let go of my fear based emotions totally, how do I just be? My passion runs deep and sometimes trips to temper and anger. How do I leave that? She directed me to the other tress, further up the hill. They are in a different position. They see things from a different perspective but also are subject to different outside influences to her. Look how wildly their branches move in the wind, being further up the hill and more exposed. Not in the wrong place, just in a different place. The place they are meant to be in. Look how they all react differently. They are all different species, all different trees, all reacting differently. Just as they are meant to. Allow myself to be me and don’t apologise for it. Not in an aggressive way, but just in a loving way. Accept myself loving and show others how to lovingly accept me, through my own demonstration of self love. Sometimes she maybe effected by the storm, but in those times she accepts it and just goes with it. She gets herself through the best way she can. And when the wind calms she can spend time repairing, still feeling the sun and loving the wind and rejoicing in the rain. As she needs all of those things to function, and repair. And then she will feel whole later. Maybe a scar, or a torn branch. But she is all the more beautiful for it. She has a new place for the insects to gather, or the birds to drink from the water that pools there, or a space for a new, protected nest. How she embraces those who shelter in her; how she provides a space for them to look after themselves. She is not looking after the young chicks, their parents are. But she will support them all as they grow and flourish.

So much wisdom. So much joy. Just by feeling her and letting her guide me. I looked in my hand and chose a petal to place at her feet in thanks as I left her.

I walked to the next part of the well, as directed by the nun, and drank some water from the lion mouth spout. For me a symbol of strength, protection and family. I blessed myself with the water. My head and my heart and my soul. I let the petals I had left go; three! the Goddess number! so perfect and so unconscious. I let my seed go and it floated down the stream. I was told by the nun it doesn’t matter where you let it go, what matters is where it settles. That is where I will grow.

I walked down to the next level and met with a friend there at the same time. We removed sandals and walked into the pool, hitching my skirt up. I stood there, feeling the water wash me clean. Splashing it over myself. Feeling it soothe my emotions. When I was ready I walked out. I went to the waterfall and dipped my feet in the water that gathered there. My friend pointed out the significance of having my feet washed.

Like Mary Magdalene, washed Jesus’ feet, one of the Goddesses in the Gospels, Mother Earth, THE Goddess was washing mine. She was acknowledging me. She was cleansing me. Stripping back what I no longer need, emotionally, in a very gentle way. Or like when Jesus washed the feet of his own circle. He was serving his followers. Showing his humility and love. And so Mother Nature and my emotions will serve me, will show me love. Connected in a spiral, in a circle, which never ends (name the movie and the song for 10 bonus points! 😉 )

But also, Christ and Mary were with me. Stood with me. Holding my space. Not in my face. Just supporting me.

I followed the Nun down to the next level of waterfall, with no shoes, feeling the joy of the grass and the dirt under my feet, as I often do. But with a new perspective.

I sat next to the water and placed another seed in; an acorn. In bopped about, not going very far. Unexpectedly caught by an undercurrent I didn’t see. And settling not too far from me. Hmmmm. Interesting. I am nearly there. At my beginning. And we all know from tiny acorns grow mighty Oaks.

I followed the water down (down it’s natural one, not the manicured one!) and settled at another well which I really wanted to look into, but couldn’t. So the Nun reminded me to just be. And I felt into the depths of the water there. I found a piece of me. A girl, with frizzy hair, shy and goofy. Blushed everytime she had opened her mouth. But with a sweet temperament, and joy in her heart. Her heart which was broken by cruelty and so she gave herself to the dark depths of the water. The dark depths of her emotions. Previous Life? This life? Both.

I retrieved her and told her how beautiful she was, that the rocks were slippy on her way back up but she would make it with the strength I now had, even with the odd grazed knee in the dark. Just to focus on the light ahead and we would get there. And we did.

And we embraced eachother, me taking a part of her and her taking a part of me. Just being. Being with eachother. And then she rose. She was in a tear drop, sadness reflecting all the beauty and colours in the world, taking her higher and higher. Her sadness made her see for herself, and reflect out to all who beheld her, the beauty in everything that the emotions give us.

I then sat with the others. And one of the group, who always gives. gave us all a gift. A compass for me. Some very practical uses, yes. But I will always be able to find my way. I am always on the right path. It will focus me on the truth. On my truth, on where I want to go. To trust my inner guidance, my inner compass. And to lovingly share my truth and help others see their own truths. It doesn’t means it’s always easy to show myself or others the path, but I can lovingly point others down it, and I can lovingly walk mine. Each at our pace. On our own tracks. Sometimes with others and sometimes alone.

We spent the rest of the day in eachother’s company. And as we sat having a fish supper and laughing, I was asked was I enjoying myself? And yes I was. But this Being was so alien to me now. Everything I had done since having my daughter was for purpose. Work, or the children, or my husband, or to develop myself, or to heal myself. Why could I not just allow myself to be? I am currently remembering how to do that and how to just Be. The small little girl who used to watch the ants, and love them. Who’d lay in the dappled shade of a tree and just take joy in it. Who would breathe the air and it would be sweet. But I’m getting there. I really am.

Love as always.

Rachael

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